12.31.2003

i'm at a complete loss

the nhl may not exist as we know it in a few years. the collective bargaining agreement is set to expire soon. and millionaire unions aren't the best at negoiating (read: major league baseball 1994).

hockey could save itself by doing something that i think should have been done a long time ago--contraction.

there are 30 nhl teams. looking at just the last 2 years of revenue only 13 teams made money. ottawa broke even and 16! lost money. over half the league is unprofitable. this year the average nhl team last over $4 million.

this year the profit margins went from +$20.1 mil (minnesota) to -$29.4 mil (st. louis).

if the league were to get rid of the six teams that have lost the most money in the last two years (st. louis, washington, phoenix, anaheim, carolina and detroit) the league would go from having lost $123 million to having made $52 million.

ok, there is a lot of history in st. louis and detroit, so sub them out for buffalo and florida and the league will only have made $20 million over the last two years, but that's still in the black folks!

another aspect of contraction is the quality of play will increase. you will weed out 6 teams worth of crappy players. that's quite a lot. all the good players from those teams will replace lower tier players on the remaining 24. this will lead to better competition, more exciting games, and better playoff series.

the league realigns into 2 conferences with 3 four team divisions. the 3 division winners plus 3 wild card teams make the playoffs. half the league makes the big dance. you shorten the first round to 5 games and give the top two seeds from each conference a bye. 7 games for conference semis and finals. 7 for lord stanley's cup.

with the quality of play increasing, more fans will go to games. this will cause even more revenue. this can then be put into the minor leagues to develop better talent which will create a better game which will attract more fans which will provide more revenue which will go in a circle til the nhl is restored to its former glory.

and for worrying about canadian teams getting the short end of the stick, well don't worry too much. toronto is the most profitable team in the league making $38 million over the last two years. and calgary didn't even crack the top ten of money losers at $9.5 mil for two years.

the top six moneymakers for the last two years are toronto ($38.5), minnesota ($32.2), dallas ($11.5), columbus ($9.6), boston ($9.5) and l.a. ($8.5)

so get rid of the bottom six moneymakers and create a better league for all involved is what i say.

all money info was taken from forbes.com, so if the numbers are wrong, yell at him.

12.30.2003

i knew steve spurrier couldn't hack it

when i'm in any state other than minnesota, i look everywhere for minnesota license plates. the probability that i know the person in a minnesota car is quite remote, but i keep the faith.

the problem comes when i come back to minnesota. i spend 49 weeks a year out of state, so when i come back i see minnesota plates everywhere. i have to continually think to myself that, yes, i'm in the state. don't look around for plates because you might cause a traffic accident then.

i like the design of the minnesota plates anyway.

12.29.2003

for more information please visit our website

i think we should have a national ID card. it would be a fantastic device.

combine bank records, driving records, medical records, any information you wanted to store. every institution could then use the card to get the information they needed.

for the paranoid out there, ways exist to keep it from violating civil liberties.

like combining it with your thumbprint--which is only stored on the card, not in a central database. and each system that wanted to use it could only access certain parts of the database. like the grocery store could only access your debit account, not your medical records. the doctor's office would access your insurance info and medical records, not your criminial record.

check in for travels would be fast and efficient. come to a both, swipe your card, scan your thumb, and off you go to the xray machine for your carry-on.

the crackdown on illegal immigrants would gain a boost. it would be hard to get a job or use a bank without the card.

could there be abuses and corruption of the system? well, of course. that possibility is inherit in any system. the real issue is can we develop this system with enough redundancies and failsafes to keep these abuses and corruptions from being feasible?

and, of course, i say yes. the pros heavily outweigh the cons with this one.

12.27.2003

i have no talent

i have always felt that adhd is a total crock.

i now have a scientist to back me up.

adhdfraud.org
interview with dr. baughman

my argument has always been (with heavy sarcastic tones), you have a 10 year old that doesn't want to sit still through math class? well, fill him up with drugs! that's obviously the way to raise your child and take the responsibility off the parents and schools. (end sarcasm)

children are acting different because of fundamental changes in society. you cannot expect institutions that haven't changed much in the last century to deal with issues that are changing yearly!

there are deeper issues we need to work on here, people.

only by trying to understand how social institutions should be serving the needs of the community can we expect to break out of this quagmire.

society serves man, not the other way around.

you cannot find joy on your own

my friend andy miller released a folk album. it's better than i could make.

currently, andy is living in sitka, alaska working for the sitka daily newspaper.

the album is called folks song from the 21st century. according to the liner notes all songs were written during the first official year of the 21st century--2001.

the cd starts out with a dylanesque tune complete with the harmonica. the next track switches gears and you can hear an immature and unrefined elvis costello coming through.

the guitar work is raw, but i think that is what makes the sound. the lyrics are little cheesy on a few of the tracks. the rhymes feeled forced on a couple of verses. but then sometimes he comes out with some interesting lyrical choices.

when i asked him about a followup album, he said no, "that's not the direction" he's moving in. andy wants to work on a rock album instead for his sophomore release.

i said let me know, i'll buy the first copy.

12.24.2003

i was on victorysports network last night

it's funny that jose padilla--a us citizen--can be detained for almost 2 years without a trial or even charges levied against him, but we can spend so much time debating the where when and how of saddam's trial. the madman that killed 300,000 of his own people gets to have a trial, but an alleged conspirator gets nothing but 19 months in a navy brig. thank God for appeal courts that can overturn ashcroft's whims.

it's funny that malvo--the dc sniper--can be convicted of 2 murders and probably is responsible for all of the sniper attacks, but gets to live the rest of his life. and don't give me crap about that's what the jury decided. there are certain levels of justice that need to be kept. he willfully--and arbitarily--took life. to me, that makes his forfeit. i'm for the death penalty. and it disgusts me that this person can go about and shoot people for the hell of it, and he himself won't get the opportunity to burn in hell for a few more years.

it's funny that leonard peltier has been sitting in jail for almost 30 years for crimes he didn't commit. wasn't it other countries that jailed their dissidents and rounded up people for imprisonment that stood up for their rights against the tyranny of government? what? it's us, too? fantastic.

it's funny that 60% of the males in prison in this country are in jail for drug possession. we can't lock up the distributors or producers, so we jail the consumers. let me tell you, federal government, there will always be consumers if the product exists.

it's funny that in this supposed season of caring and giving, i see more and more injustice being metted out from the american stronghold of democracy and freedom than i truly care to see.

and by it's funny, i mean i'm saddened by how the land of the free and the home of the brave is losing the spark that made it such an awe-inspiring (awe!!) nation.

12.23.2003

and the aardvark didn't even care

i really enjoy watching bank commercials. and by enjoy, i mean i loathe with my entire being.

bank commercials consist of something like this: john doe had a special circumstance. bank did what it could to help out mr. doe. john doe know worships the bank and loves everyone that works there--including the janitor. the bank wants you to know that you can be just like john doe, too. come love the bank. everyone loves the bank. come love the bank.

this i believe is bad. the commercial should go like this: john doe has bad credit, so he can't get loans. bank gave john the loan at 24% plus made him open a savings account with a $1000 minimum that has a interest rate well below the inflation rate. john does loves the bank only because he is too stupid to know otherwise. the bank wants to screw you for your money too. come let the bank screw you. everyone loves geting screwed. come get screwed.

my problem with advertising is that it doesn't tell you how the product is better than the other ones on the market. ads appeal to people's fear. mainly the fear of no sex--which, i'll grant, is a mighty big one. advertising doesn't provide actual facts and figures to educate the consumer and allow them to make pertinent choices in the marketplace. advertising plays on emotions and irrational arguments.

this problem with advertising is just one aspect of what is wrong with the american capitalist system. there are many problems that need to be fixed, and i think we can start here with the advertising.

12.22.2003

beautiful words, no?

well, i'll be blogging live from hibbing, mn for the next few days. tis the season to visit the fam. my journey here wasn't too bad. but not too good either. here's a running diary of what went on:

1:45PM--julian gives me a ride to the train station.
2:15PM--the train leaves. i read the fourth book in the dune series
3:45PM--arrive in back bay 10 minutes late. no biggie, so i try to hop on the orange line. the til i try to go through doesn't work. i'm forced to buy a second token. no dice. i go complain again to the clerk, and he lets me through no problem.
3:47PM walk to the platform to catch the subway.
3:50PM switch to the blue line to go the airport
3:51PM train rolls up while i walk to platform
3:58PM get off blue line
3:59PM shuttle to airport arrives. i'm like, this is awesome. i haven't had to wait at all. i'm going to get to the terminal and coast through everything . it's going to be fantastic. yea for reger.

4:05PM i'm staring at the line for northwest airlines e-ticket checkin. my flight leaves at 5:51. i'm screwed.
5:16PM i'm finally to the front of the line. there are still people checking in for the detriot flight that leaves in oh, 10 minutes.
5:20PM my bag is checked, i ask for quickest way to my gate. i say thankee and go where i'm supposed to go.

5:21PM i see the largest line at a security checkpoint i have ever seen.
5:22PM i wonder if i can get 2 free flights and a hotel room out of missing my flight.
5:35PM i want a hotel that serves breakfast.
5:40PM the guy behind who is going to memphis on a 6:30 flight starts yelling at the northwest guy. the northwest guy ignores him and tells the crowd, "this is out of our hands now, you're waiting on the federal government. and since they took over, this place is slower than the post office." that gets some chuckles, but not from memphis. he's kind bitchy.
5:45PM i start the security check in. everyone off with the shoes. put all metal objects in the basket to be scanned.

5:46PM the guy in front of me sets off the metal detector. "i told you to put all metal objects in the basket."
"you never told me to put my watch in there."
"i said put all metal objects in the basket."
"you never told me to put my watch in the basket."
"if you can't tell your watch is metal, we have bigger problems than you not hearing me"
5:52PM my plane hasn't left yet, cuz i'm the second person in the minneapolis line, and there are like 50 people behind me. i don't set off the metal detector, i put everything in the basket.

5:53PM my bag comes through and the guy holds it up. "who's stuff is this?"
"mine" i'm pretty sure i didn't pack my ki of coke, so i should be good.
"i just have to check some things. please don't reach for your stuff at anytime and answer all my questions"
"cool, man" and all i was thinking was, "if i miss my flight because of the federal government, how many free flights can i get from this?"
the guy pulls through all my stuff, takes some stuff out to get "rescanned." and talks to the guy using the xray machine. the searching guy holds up my keys and the xray guy nods. the search guy comes back over and says, " we didn't know what your keychain was. it's pretty cool." it's a guinness bottle opener. that's right. i impressed a federal agent.

6:04 on the plane.
6:21 still on the runway
6:34 takeoff

7:30 northwest is doing this new thing where you buy your inflight meal instead of just getting one. so for $5 i bought the low end meal. it was a turkey and ham sandwich (pretty damn good one, too), raisins, goldfish crackers, potato chips and oreos. and the beverage cart gave me the entire can. i really hate it when they just give you the little cup and not the whole can. but anyway, it was the best $5 i could have spent on a flight. i was totally satisfied by the meal. good job northwest!

one thing that bothered me, though, was some people's inability to listen. they had 2 higher priced entrees. a chicken sandwich and a orange beef salad. when they got to our section, they had run out of the chicken sandwich. the flight attendant said this to EVERYONE "we have the beef salad and the snack box left. we are out of the chicken." i counted at least 4 people that then went through this exchange:
"well, i'll have the chicken then."
"sorry, all we have is the beef salad or the snack box"
"no chicken?"
"no, just the salad or the snack box."
"is the snack box chicken?"
"no, the menu we handed out says it's a turkey and ham sandwich."
"no chicken?"
"no"
"i'll have the beef salad."

9:30 we begin our final approach. captain comes on and says everyone making the san fransico connection, the planes leaves at 9:22 from gate something something. i look at my watch and think. "that's the suck. it's 9:30"
then the captain says that the local time was 8:30PM.
central time!
where primetime starts at 7 and the news is on at 10.

10:15 flight to duluth leaves on time. yippee!

10:45 we begin decent into duluth, and my ears plug up and start hurting. i try yawning, swallowing, chewing stuff. little is working to pop my ears. and on the occasion they do pop, it's accompanied by stabbing pains. intense stabbing pain.
this brings my brain back to a thought i had a few days ago. what if you ear drums were to burst on a flight? you're just sitting there, the pain keeps ramping up, til it gets to a point where it just blows and you can't hear anything then, except probably a pretty good ringing. you put your hands to your ears and feel the ooze of blood coming out of your ear canal. you start screaming for the flight attendant or a doctor. you can't hear yourself scream. your ears are broken. and i was thinking if that could be worth millions or just hundreds of thousands from the airlines?

10:59 see the parents in the terminal. i'm home for the holidays.

monday, 3:30PM my ears finally pop and i can hear normally.

12.19.2003

day 1 of my epic journey started with a bit of toast and jam

in my unextensive travels i have found that the best places to get gyros are the places that pronounce them year-o and not jy-ro.

a gyro is a wonderful sandwich consisting of few ingredients.

pita bread
onions
tomatoes
lettuce
lamb meat
cucumber sauce

all ingredients are required, none may be subsituted or omitted or added without changing the very essence of the sandwich and removing its gyro status--reducing it to merely a pita.

there a few key points to a good year and they deal with respective ingredients

first, the pita must be warm and soft. hard and dry? feed pigeons and buy new pitas.

the onions should be checked to make sure they are not too strong. you want ones with kick, but no need to make my eyes water.

tomatoes should be how i like a woman's breast to be--fresh and firm.

lettuce should be crisp and cold.

lamb meat is key. you can buy your own gyro meat that is already presliced and cooked, you just need to heat it up. but that meat sucks. you need to find a place that is roasting the lamb right there. it should be a vertical roaster spinning the lamb slowly to ensure proper, even cooking. and your meat should be sliced fresh off the roast, straight onto the pita. it's magical.

the sauce is an overlooked ingredient sometimes, but it is considered to the soul of the gyro. creamy and cool, no lumps or grains. smooth and delicious is how all sauce should be. you like-ah the sauce? everybody like-ah the sauce.

that said, the best place to get a gyro is in hibbing during the summertime. there are these greeks that own one of those trailers that they haul around and make gyros for the good people of northern minnesota. and nothing beats a gyro and mt dew on a hot summer day at one of the many wonderful community events going on all over the iron range.

and remember, folks, a good year-o is hard to find. if you want a jy-ro, i can talk to one of my engineer friends.

12.18.2003

i want a book deal

i'm just going to come out and say it.

i believe in an objective reality. an absolute truth. God. the original source. oreos and milk.

call it what you want (a rose by any other name...), but i believe that there is something that exists independent of my sensal perception of it.

that's the crux. independent of mine--or anyone's--sensal perception of it.

example. on the other side of the galaxy there is an alien race that has a clothing design that we cannot even fathom as humans. now, because we have no direct knowledge of it, does that keep it from existing?

i say NO with a force to shake the heavens.

simple non-experience or non belief in regards to a concept does not negate the existence of such a concept.

now, i'm not claiming that i know what the absolute Truth or what the objective Reality is. that is not my concern or is it even a relevant point. i am making the claim that there is an objective concept that exists indepedent of sensal perception by the only known consciousness in the universe--ours.

if you say i'm wrong, that there is not an Ultimate Reality, the only things that exists are the things we sense, then i make the claim that i sense the Absolute Truth and therefore it exists. (weak argument? yes, but it's all i got for now.)

how many people don't believe in an objective, ultimate, absolute reality (no matter what's it called)?

can something exist without your knowing it or even without your capacity to know it?
i say yes.

12.16.2003

the prediction has been reversed

so roughly 23 minutes after my last post, i realized that i didn't need to worry about this exam.
why?because this is what the problem said, "reger, you are a super genius. i'm just going to give you a 100 just for showing up."
well, that's paraphrased. there were some mathematical symbols on it, but the gist of it was that i'm a super genius.

i also figured out how i can get a degree from wpi--my dropout alma mater. it's a program called masters of mathematics for educators. and guess what? i'm going to be a math educator when i finish up at worcester state! the sweet deal about this whole thing is if you're a teacher, you get a 40% off the regular tuition. cha-ching.

when i flip channels to see what is on, i'm always amazed by how hot the chicks in the commercials on the spanish channel are. even the sears commercials have way better looking women than the english commercials. is the hispanic population that much more motivated by sex in advertising or are spanish chicks just that much more hot? since i don't habla espanol, i may never know.

it really bothers me when i see people give up a choice because it will require some effort. i am an example of what happens when you don't put effort into your life decisions. this is why people should listen to me. i am a prime example of what not to do with your life. just put the effort in. you may fail, but at least you tried. contentment is no substitute for happiness.

if the purpose of iraq was wmd, our intelligence community sucks balls. if it was to free the people of an oppressed nation, i've got quite a good list of other countries that should have come first instead of the most secular, most western arab state. catching saddam is good as it keeps him from rebuilding a power base, but i'd still rather have osama in an 8 by 8 or 6 under. 9 months in iraq is enough but 2 years in afghanistan obviously isn't. setting an example of pre-emptive war is bad international precedent. especially when a country that isn't bound from using chemical, biological or nuclear (*cough* n. korea *cough*) as their pre-emptive strike. i've come to the conclusion that unless i'm in charge, i won't be satisfied with any political leadership in this country.

Reger's Road to the White House 2016

the prediction is nada

i'm 22 minutes away from a final that i need to pass to get a b in the class. just pass it and get a b. it may or may not happen.

12.15.2003

authority position does not equal respect position

they are showing a little segment on mtv about tegan and sara. these canadian imports are punker girls that are super cute.

getting an mtv news segment is how you know you are moving up in the music industry. i should know. i've never been on mtv news and music career is in the shitter.

i saw the lovely ladies open up for ben folds last spring. i'm always impressed when girls can punk/rock/pop out. there aren't many good female artists out there in that genre, and that's too bad. women can do things with their voice that guys just can't do.

and they look much better naked.

12.13.2003

and for my next trick

i think that we should change the current jury trial system. i think when you get jury duty, it's automatic duty. medical conditions notwithstanding. and it's for a month. you spend that month matched with a certain judge and you hear as many trials as you can. 28-30 days service, depending on how the trials end. if you go over, you'll get further compensation and a bye on your next jury duty. courts don't have to pick juries for every trial. and you already have them waiting for the next case. wham bam straight to trial, ma'am. i think it could clear up the courts a little bit, and give people more civic responsibility. a sense of which is sorely lacking in this great democracy of ours. or i could just be talking out of my ass.

12.12.2003

staying up all night adds a day to your life

i find both liberals and conservatives not satisfying my position when it comes to the environment.

on one hand, i believe that we should ban using chemicals--herbicides and pesticides--on our food sources.
on the other, i think that we should be growing more gmo (genetically modified organisms) than we are now.

i think we should protect as much wilderness as we can through national parks and wildlife refuges without sacrficing the resources contained in the land. selective logging weeds out old growth, allows new life, and shrinks the risk of wildfire. minerals and fuels can be found and mined judiciously without destroying the ecosystems.

fossil fuels provide cheap energy, but offer too much pollution. alternate forms provide the energy without the pollution. alternate like nuclear. there should be a reactor on every street corner. we have technology to safely dispose of the waste (breeder reactors, send the spent rods to space, make more nuclear missles), but there is a fear created by the hippie that keeps us from this solution.

while the release of pollutants and the destruction of ecosystems to make way for our cities and roads and farms does have an impact on the planet, i still do not buy the fact that we are affecting the climate of earth as much as the alarmists are claiming. we have no idea what the long term effects of our meddling will be, if at all. before every ice age, the temperature spikes worldwide. buy boots and mittens for your great great grandkids now.

we need to reduce our dependence on harvesting domesticated animals. a single domesticated animal uses up more resources than a single human would. simple efficiency says we should no longer eat domesticated harvested animal. eat a tomato and kill the meat yourself. (this is another issue--the sanctity of life and the understanding of taking it to sustain your own. plant or animal you must kill to live. realization of this is the curse of the conscious predator)

i believe that research, when given the proper impetus (read: money), can produce viable technology that will allow us to adapt our human societies to the changing cycles of the natural earth. technology given proper guidance upon the principle of serving society for the betterment of the society will do no less than that.

Reger's Road to the White House 2016

12.11.2003

ugh

i moped my brow with the back of my hand. i hate getting sweat in my eyes. i tasted the sweat. it had no taste. not the raw, stank of work sweat. just the sticky wet of please-God-cool-me-down sweat.
i blocked the sun out with my left hand. my right hand stayed on target.
"you know i could kill you with one twitch of my finger?"
"kill me and you'll never find him."
"oh, i'll find him. God as my witness, Reltan will not win this."
he winced, waiting for the surprise that would end him. i did not end him.
i think the butt of the gun to the back of the head was enough of a surprise.
i mounted my horse and rode east into the rising sun.
it was going to be hot day.

i haven't had a normal dream in weeks.

12.10.2003

i think i may have used this title before...

i didn't plan on shooting up the registrar's office.
it was the only way out.
i had sat down at a lab computer to check to see how many credits i needed for my final semester at worcester state. it wasn't many.
but i saw that i had to take abstract algebra again.
i wasn't going to stand for this clerical mistake.
i ran out of the computer lab and hurried to the registrar's. they would clear this up. i had already taken that damn class and passed it with a b.
i walked through the door, and knew it was a trap.
"reger, we've been waiting."
i didn't hesitate. i pulled out my desert eagles and let the boomsticks do the talking.
fire was returned, i felt the searing of a bullet in my left arm. i dropped the pistola in that hand and dove behind a desk. i was going to clear up this registration error if it killed me.
"all i want to do is graduate!"
"then take the proper classes!"
"i took it the first semester i was here!"
the shots silenced. the ringing in my ears didn't.
"you sure?"
"i have my transcript right here."
i showed them the paper.
"sorry. our mistake."

my dreams are really weird.

12.09.2003

kudos

i didn't even realize it had happened til i just took a look at my stats. here's the info on the 10,000 visitor to my humble website.

Domain Name verizon.net ? (Network)
IP Address 68.#.#.#
Language Setting English
Operating System Microsoft WinXP
Browser Internet Explorer 6.0
Time of Visit Dec 05 2003 7:24:58 pm
Page Views 1
Referring URL http://www.lilachicad.blogspot.com/
Time Zone UTC-5:00
EST - Eastern Standard
EDT - Eastern Daylight Saving Time
Visitor's Time Dec 05 2003 7:24:58 pm

it took a mere 18 months to get this traffic. yippee! (though, probably close to 6000 hits are my mom, but whatever)

posting has been sporadic due to network problems by ted

we begin saturday morning.
i awake and find myself a bit dehydrated. i get out of bed and start the day with a prayer to the porcelain gods. go about doing my thing, getting my stuff on. later that afternoon i start feeling cold. so cold. so i go try to take a nap.

finally after 30 minutes of uncontrollable shivering (during which i thought, "if i could just stop shivering long enough to stand up so someone could shoot me in the head").

i awake a couple hours later with every joint in my body aching. i had just gone 15 rounds with the champ. and the champ was wearing brass knuckles.

so i move to the couch where i sit between occasional trips to the bathroom or to wander in a fever induced haze.

i never felt my fever. i just felt massively cold. i was pale. being awake caused nasuea.

i went to sleep at 9pm (on a saturday!!) and slept for 10 hours straight. sunday morning i awake to intense hunger and low level nausea.

i'm back to being fine. physically, at least. the emotional scarring runs deep.

12.04.2003

my God, they're huge!

Teachers today have to be concerned about more than just teaching their subject. Educators need to pay attention to the phsyical and mental well-being of our students. If a student isn't healthy, they obviously aren't going to be too concerned about the dates of the civil war or the cosine of pi. It is important that teachers stay on top of the health trends affecting our nation's children today.

We are making progress on children's health in some areas. between 1998 and 2000, child poverty dropped from 19 to 18% and teenage pregnancy went from 32 to 30 births per 1000. while not major improvements, the progression is in the right direction.

But there are still many areas where we need to place our attention and resources. Some of them include:
asthma, ADHD, obesity, depression and eating disorders.

asthma is the constriction of the muscles in the breathing passages. it makes exhaling your breath very difficult. the lining of the airway may be filled with heavy mucous. and children report asthma attacks as very scary. Treatment usually involves an inhaler to stop the attack, or daily medication to prevent attacks from happening at all.

Asthma affliction rose 75% from 1980-94 for children under age 14. It has become the number one chronic illness in children today. it is the third leading cause of hospitalization in children under 15.

there are some ideas onto the cause of this increase. one theory is that children who are born pre-mature have much better chances of survival thanks to increases in medicinal technology. no one knows the long term affects this is having on the health of those children though. another idea is that the air pollution caused by industry is having an impact. the dirty air is not what humans were designed to breathe. also biological pollution--insect and rodent exrement in very low income housing has been blamed for some cases of asthma. of course, genetics also plays a role. with more people having asthma, it is becoming more likely that their children may also have it. and changes in our modern lifestyle have also been blamed. spending more and more time indoors in buildings that closed air systems--sealed against the weather and pollution may carry more allergens and disease causing microbes. obesity and asthma rates have been linked in some studies.

the important thing to remember is that asthma is treatable and many people live normal lives with it. if you, as a teacher, encounter an asthma attack. see if the child has any medication on him or if the school nurse has it. if the attack continues, send them to the school nurse, who may or may not seek medical attention.

God, i hate group presentations...

12.03.2003

hi! my name is apple cider, and i'll be your waitress.

well, rush is winding down once again here at wpi. tke gave out 20 bids this year. a respectable number any year, but this year the rumors around the hill were that some houses were having a really rough time with their rushes, so i'm very excited about giving out 20 this year. i feel there is a very good chance all 20 will sign on friday night as well. score one for reger as rush chair.

it's always interesting to see how rush goes and what kind of kids decide they want to join tke, and what kind of kids we want to join tke. the maturation of the sophomores as they go from rushees to rushers is also one of my favorite happenings of rush. the rush event themselves are good times. good times.

two things i don't like about rush. one is minor, the time it takes to make rush effective. it's more work than you would think, and a lot of activities suffer because of it (gf, schoolwork, sleep). the other is quite major and kind of disturbing to me. and that is during bid voting. there you see how the brothers of the house view what they think tke should be. me, if i don't have a personal problem with a rushee or don't hear too many people complain about the kid, i will give him my vote and extend him a bid. i feel the purpose of tke (to build better men) can be applied to the all star rushees as well as though that need a swift kick in the ass for a much needed attitude adjustment. i've seen some brothers that have gone on to be great leaders in the house almost not get a bid based on what some people thought the image of tke should be or how the rushee was judged.

that aspect of tke hurts me a lot, because the tke was founded on a principle of not judging people on "rank, wealth or honor." we are to see them for their "personal worth and character." i think if people kept that in mind. not just on the back burner, but on the front--right in front of their eyes all the time, tke would be an even more fantastic place than it is now.

idealistic? yes. but that's what you gotta be when you are a Defender of Love, Charity and Esteem.

12.02.2003

the bus was freaking late this morning, so i missed my 8:30 class. go me.

there are a few commercials out there that disturb me these days. they are spreading some ethical and moral views that i don't subscribe to, and i don't think anyone else should either.

first, the charter communications high speed internet access commercial. using dial-up the internet was so hard to get to, and little billy was only get C- on his papers. but with high speed internet the web comes alive and now little billy gets A+s on his papers and he can go to harvard! no, little billy is still stupid. it's just now he found downloadschoolpapers.com and is plagarising his way to harvard.

second, another charter communication ad. this one for digital cable and their 30 day moneyback guarantee. not bad, but the ad has a woman carrying a man in a tux back to a church and telling the clergyman, "you married us 30 days ago, but it's not working out. i want to return him." she gives him back to the reverend and goes on her merry way. ack! treating it as either secular or religious, i don't believe marriage should be taken so freaking lightly! it should be serious commitment between two people. maybe not til death do us part, but longer than a month!

the anti marijuana ad where the kid grabs his dad's gun and shoots his friend. the shining spot of that ad is when the one kid says, "dude, your sister is hot." stoners only want a limited amount of things when they are blazing. 1)getting more blazed. 2)finding food and/or drink. 3)playing video games 4)passing out. if you want to attack drug users and their bad habits, at least pick situations that are real and will make sense to your target audience.


vehixdotcom. the kid comes into the computer room with the sister and says mom is looking for a new car. but it's a used station wagon and he doesn't want to be dropped off at school in an used station wagon. guess what kid? shut the fuck up and ride the bus you whiny little brat. IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU RIDE TO SCHOOL!

commercials bite.

11.30.2003

92 yard kickoff return with time running out is a kick in the junk

growing up, i was really good friends with the kid on the next block, dan.we screwed around a lot in our younger days. rough and tumble games that caused each other a lot of pain and suffering.

i managed to run into a garage while playing tag and put my arm through a window. i still have quite a large scar on my left forearm from it.

racing down a hill on our bikes, i managed to crash and put the handlebar into my gut. i thought i had ruptured my liver. i was close, though.

racing our bikes through the alley, we came out into traffic and i smashed right into a car and rolled over the trunk. i think i scared the old lady driving more than i hurt myself.

but i think dan had the better stories.

he slipped down my basement stairs one day--the whole flight--and bruised his tailbone.

playing in the garage attic, he crashed through rotted floorboards and barely caught himself from falling, but scraped up his legs and arms pretty good.

wrestling in his front yard, i slammed his head into the sidewalk and chipped his two front teeth. (that's the only specific event i remember, but i'm pretty sure i chipped his teeth on at least three separate occasions)

this stray dog came into the yard, and it climbed under the boat trailer. dan crawled under to get it, but the dog started snapping at him. he backed out quick and slammed his head into the trailer hitch. concussion.

these were only what injuries we caused each other. there were plenty of times we hurt ourselves from being stupid.
but that's another day.

11.29.2003

i have stopped biting 9 of my 10 fingernails

back in about 3rd or 4th grade (maybe both), wednesday afternoons were pretty light. kids could go to religious education classes at their local churches if they wanted to (or their parents wanted them to). i never had to go. there were only a few of us that didn't go, so we basically had wednesday afternoons to just play.

i used to write little stories. only two of them i remember clearly. one was about a knight that had to slay a dragon and rescue a princess. the other was about a group of us (the wednesday kids) that found a cave and went on a fantasy voyage to get back to our little burg of hibbing.

there was a program called HAT. hibbing academically talented. i got to go. i was in the creative writing class. we met once a week and wrote and did little mind puzzles to make us think "outside the box." there was another HAT class. the math and science class. i wanted to be in that class, but i was stuck in writing.

i had the notion back then that an artist couldn't change the world. you needed to be the guy to invent cold fusion or faster than light travel or the president to do that. now i think that one person can't change the world. one idea, maybe, but you need a lot of people behind that idea to change our world.

i wanted to be in the science and math program so i could hone those skills. i groomed my education to reflect that fact. i took all the science and math i could in high school. i focused on the sciences and not the arts. i actually only took one art class in high school and it was computer graphics. go figure. i gave up on my writing and looked to formulas and theories instead.

i still read as much as i did when i was younger, but the books were about quantum physics or mathematics (i own a book about the history of zero) instead of just plain stories.

turning my mind's eye back (with its wonderful 20/20), i see that maybe i shouldn't have given up on the arts. maybe i should have stayed with the writing. my dream job for the last couple years would to be a free-lance editorial columnist. not so much creative writing, but the word would be my paycheck.

it's only been in the last year or so that i've begun to think of the art of writing as a serious pursuit.

i don't know what i can write, though. maybe that's why there is no direction to this blog, i'm still trying to find out what i'm supposed to do with the ideas and words and sentences floating through my conscious and just below it.

in my head i come up with fantasic stories. usually about me doing something in the future that is cool or heroic or world-changing or would just make a good movie for a saturday matinee. i have a few that i play over and over again. refining details here and there. changing the characters to fit people in my life at the moment. building it so the story is more real.

but i hit a snag when i try to get the story out of my head. the ink doesn't flow as well as my thoughts. my train of thought is lacking exits to the external world. maybe i'll write that novel, maybe i won't. hell, it might turn into a book of poetry if that's all i can produce.

all i know is if i keep turning the valve a little bit and release more of my mind out into print, i'll hit a critical point where the flow just busts open and then you'll hear about my pulitzer.

11.27.2003

dear diary...jackpot

wednesday was a busy day at work. being the day before turkey day and all. i was running a register for the whole night and one incident struck me.

this old man came up to buy milk. the line was 4 or 5 people deep. he put the gallon on the counter. he took out his wallet and change purse. slowly but methodically he counted out the exact change. two dollar bills, two quarters, two dimes, a nickel and four pennies. this took him quite a while to do. i took the money and asked if he wanted the gallon in a bag. he said yes because it was easier to carry. i placed the milk in a bag, handed him it and his reciept and wished him a happy thanksgiving. he told me to enjoy mine, too. he slowly walked away. the whole transaction took almost five minutes long but i didn't mind. there was nothing wrong with the man. not disabled or feeble, just an old man.

the woman behind him was buying a couple things of candy. she came to the front of the line in a huff. "some people shouldn't be shopping if they are going to take up people's time." i didn't say anything. not my place to put customers in their place. "some of us don't have time to wait around." i nodded and handed her her groceries and her change.

the next man in line had a full cart of groceries. i said hello and asked how his day was. fine, happy to be done with shopping. i told him i hear that. he then looked at me and said "my father was like that the last couple years of his life. nothing wrong, just an old man that couldn't move fast. it hurt me to see him like that. now, i don't care how long seniors move. i understand." i nodded. "i'd hate to be that woman's father when he gets old." i nodded and said, "sooner or later, we all get old. you just gotta deal with it."

i bagged his groceries, took his cash, gave him his change, and wished him a happy thanksgiving. he smiled at me and said, "sooner or later, man. you got it. nothing to do but move on. sooner or later, man." i nodded. "have a good one while you can."

sooner or later, man. sooner or later.

11.25.2003

i do not regret the things i have done, only those i did not do

one of main differences between men and women is the way they treat the towel after the shower.

guys will do one thing: hang it over the shower curtain or some other bar-type apparatus.

girls will do one thing: take it some place a towel doesn't belong.

when a guy gets done with the shower, he dries off wherever the shower happens to be located in the house. he then takes the towel and hangs it up in the same room the shower is located in!

when a girl is done with the shower, she puts on the towel like a dress (without actually drying off). puts another(!) towel around her hair and then walks around the house for the next hour or so doing little chores. the main towel and its superfluous hair cousin will then be thrown onto some cloth covered furniture that isn't normally designed to have water on it--namely the bed.

so now we have water tracked around the house because no actual drying was done in the shower, we have multiple towels wet and--if the shower was anywhere remotely near bedtime--the linens will be damp when you crawl into bed.

i really think there should be distinct classifications for men--homo sapiens--and women--homo insane.

11.24.2003

krispy kremes are made with smack

for the fourth year in a row, i have run for a ritual office of my fraternity, tau kappa epsilon. for the third year in a row, i have been denied.

the irony of this situation is a few years ago (senior yr of hs and fresh/soph year of college) i was becoming more and more afraid of taking risks and reaching out for tasks, and yet i was winning elections, put into positions of power/authority and accepting risks. now that i've finally started overcoming that fear and am willing to fail and take risks, all i do is fail.

the funny thing is that every time i have failed at tke, i have gone on to do something good with the fraternity anyway. i've been an excellent steward twice, i've been rush chairmen twice, and i was selected to help run the pledge program this year, and yet, even though i've developed this track record of taking a job, doing it well, and making sure the people around me succeed, i'm still not trusted with authority.

the main complaints against me are i don't complete tasks and i don't listen to other's opinion and i'm very strong minded. i don't know about the completing tasks part--personal life, yes. for tke? just as often as everyone else. being stubborn and willing to voice my opinion? one of my strengths. not listening to others? i guess people don't realize that i do listen to others and i do assimilate their opinion into mine. i just keep voicing my opinion because i believe it is a valid position that deserves attention.

does this mean that after this year i'll quit after four full years of active duty in tke? quit after 4 years of dropping out of college, fucking up my credit, fucking up my life and still caring about tke? quit after 4 years of being one of the most dedicated and devoted tkes living in the house? quit after 4 years when all the people i joined with and have become really close friends have moved away and continued their lives while i'm stuck in a loop?

probably not, after all, someone will need to be rush chair next year.

afterthought: i still can't believe i went into the election with a solid, cohesive plan for what to do with the office and how to help all the novice officers with their tranisitions and i lost to someone that had PREVIOUSLY REMOVED THEMSELVES FROM THE RACE. but i'm not bitter.

11.21.2003

why is it november 21 and 60 degrees?

i have found that some people are very close minded.

some people are willing to make judgements based upon one thing that someone else claims.

i try to make sure i wait til i get to know them myself, or i find people (plural) that do know them, and i'll trust their opinion.

what i won't do is condemn them for something that i myself have done in the past. being a hypocrite is pretty fookin bad. he who is without sin shall cast the first stone.

and where i'm standing, ain't nobody going to be throwing.

11.20.2003

with more than 400 dead - if you count the eggs and "coral" - finding nemo is the disney movie with the highest body count

i find that i can't write very well.

i've tried to write fiction, but it doesn't come across as real, like good authors can make it.

i've tried to write true stuff, but i can't flow the words.

there are some people that i read everyday (pretty much everyone on my "don't know" list of blogs, and some on "do know" list as well!) that are so good i want to write just like them.

but when i imitate them, it again feels like not me. which it isn't. i ain't no tony pierce, just reger.

so i try different things out. i write lists. i write stories. i write rants. i write raves.

i write about my life, but is it any good?

my writing, i mean. my life being good or not is a whole nother story.

and who is my writing supposed to be good for?

me?

you?

i check my hits, look at the counter, see how much traffic i'm getting, but that's just hubris. the idea that my words actually matter to other people.

not that that's bad, but it's not good to think of it as the primary reason to write here.

i write here to improve myself.

i still think something monumental is missing from my life, and i don't know what or where it is.

maybe from organizing and cleaning out my head, it will come through the haze that is me.

or maybe it won't.

either way, i'll keep making stuff up, exaggerating my tales, or telling the truth.

it all depends on me.

11.19.2003

to offset the caffiene in coke, just add rum

a semi-plausible press conference in 2017:

so President reger, do you really write your own blog or is it a team of trained staff writers?

no, i still write my own entries. always have, always will.

mr president, do you think the american public actually cares about the sandwich you ate last night?

i write about whatever. my blog is my release to the world. 15 minutes of writing everyday helps clear my head. if i decide to write about a sandwich, so be it. no body said anybody had to actually read it.

mr president, hi, scott from fox news, fair and balanced, even though we never covered your campaign and even mudslinged against you. my question is a two parter. how do you keep sensitive government data from being leaked out on your blog, and two, was the sandwich good?

i'll answer the second part first: yes. as far as "sensitive government data" goes, i write about sandwiches and movies and sports and life in general. the most i write about the actual government is when i mention how my secret service detail is going.

thanks for coming, everyone.

11.18.2003

multiplicative inverses and their properties

mass high court rules gays legally entitled to wed under state constitution
good for them, good for society, bad for fundamentalists, bad for conservatives of the republican party.

the non-acceptance of homosexuality by our society is really perplexing to me. gays and lesbians do not harm any straight people. they do not turn people gay. and the only reason they get in our face is because we do not allow them to live their private lives they way they want to. they do not harm society and are not a drag on it, like say the people that live off of welfare, or the bigots that attack gays and minorities for simply existing?

why can't we just let them be? it really bothers me that societal privleges and rights are only extended to a certain few.
sometimes it's shameful being a college going middle class white heterosexual male.

11.17.2003

so i climbed back into bed and set my sights on monday

so, reger, why doesn't your right foot point straight forward?

what are you talking about?

reger, look at your feet. the right one points out a good 15-20 degrees.

what? come on, look. my feet point strai...OH GOD!

see?

yeah, yeah, i know. i don't know when it happened. i used to roll and sprain my ankles a lot when i was younger. i don't know if that has anything to do with it, but there it is. my right foot points out a good 15+ degrees from straight. i can make my foot straight, but i need to twist my whole leg. gotta twist from the hip, ya do.

is it a handicap or a physiological advantage?

well, i can get a quicker step off, because i can distribute my weight, and push with an angle causing the torq... i have nothing.

i thought so

11.16.2003

viable ossicilations of the doping agent

so recap last night at work:

delivery truck late, so it's 11 before the whole truck is unloaded (1.5 hours behind schedule)

19 pallets are delivered (normal night 12-13)

one guy sleeps late and shows up at 3:30 (4 hours late)

i was fighting off SARS, ebola, malaria and the haunta virus all at once

i drank over a gallon of water and was still thirsty

my mouth is sore from sucking down cough drops like they were oxygen

store opens at 9am; we finished at 9am

i'm running on dayquil and orange hi-c.

it's a been a long, strange trip.

11.14.2003

it's a junior mint

you ever see that commercial for focus factor?

i hate that commercial. it creeps me out

i know the guy that runs it is proud of his company and his product, but he creeps me out.

his eyes don't point in the same direction. i know that's not a bad thing, whatever. my feet don't point in the same direction (another day, my friends). but i'm not making you look at my feet on a commercial either.

but i can't look away either. it's like a train wreck.

11.13.2003

as a man lay dying, he asked his irish friend if he would poor this bottle of whiskey over his grave. the irishman thought about it for a second and replied, "do you mind if i pass it through my kidneys first?"

vegetarians and vegans have gone too far!

people that have given up meat and/or dairy products should not be allowed to even have imitation items!

if you have decided that things such as bacon should not be eaten on ethical or moral grounds, then i think you should suck it up and not eat any imitation or flavored stuff either.
no soy bacon!
no bacon flavored tofu!
you gave up bacon. that's a sacrifice, and i think you should sacrifice.

you know how the continually improve the taste of imitation bacon? by comparing it to real bacon! which means pigs are still being slaughtered, carved up and salted--all for your satisfaction!

pepporoni? same deal. hot dogs? while not technically meat to begin with, same idea. i could go on and on about meat products and their imitations, but now i turn my attention to dairy.

but it's the same argument! how do you get fake cheese to taste like real cheese? compare the fake to the real! cows are still being milked without permission!

chickens are still being forced to lay eggs for the man!

if you want to take an ethical/moral stand on eating animals and animal by-products, then stand all the way!

give up everything that could even be mistaken as animal!
only eat tofu and fruit and nuts!
no soy cheese, no soy pepporoni, no soymilk (which is really just soyjuice--stop fooling yourself with the incorrect nomenclature).

give it up veggie eaters!
give it up!

11.12.2003

wowzah!

i am continually disappointed by the bush administration's environmental record. case in point, the EPA has decided that--under the clean air act--it does not have the authority to crub emissions of carbon dioxide or other so-called "greenhouse gases."

now, i am not totally sure about global warming. the changes may just be part of the earth's natural cycle, but i still don't see why my not buying into global warming should keep me from wanting less pollutants in the air.

power plants account for 40% of america's co2 production, another 20% from passenger vehicles. this ruling undermines a california law requiring automakers to lower global warming pollutants from cars and trucks.

the clean air act defines an air pollutant as any chemical or physical substance thrown into the air by human sources.
the bush epa has ruled carbon dioxide does not fit under that definition (the clinton epa had decided it did fit under that definition).

i just want common sense in the white house.
vote for reger november 8, 2016.

11.11.2003

cave of the doorway

she cried angrily, pacing the room shaking fists at demons that weren't there.
"i'll bring him back. whatever it takes, i will," knowing full-well that just might mean his life.
she stopped moving; she cried harder. but these were the sweet tears of relief, not bitter from sorrow.
she came to him and hugged him. a meeting of eyes, and the locking of lips. it was not a lustful kiss, but a kiss of love nonetheless. a kiss he had waited many years for. a kiss that he would have paid blood for not too long ago. oh, how he wanted to hold her there and confess his love. his love to a woman that loved not he, but the fool he had just sworn to save. he wanted to hold her in his arms and take her there in the shallow of the evening. but she couldn't know. not yet anyway. not with him still prisoner and his blood beating yet.
so he did nothing--silent as he ever was. when the kiss finished, she lowered his eyes from him. her cheeks now flush was color, but not from rage or sadness. she could sense what he had thought, and felt embarrassed for him--felt pity. she could never love him. before, mayhap, but never now. never now. she knew where his destiny lie, and it wasn't bright for long. she turned and left the small room. stopping at the doorway on to whisper, "thank you....and goodbye."
tell her this is the last time you'll ever see her in this world! screamed his brain, but another voice told him she already knew. and that was the voice he always trusted. the voice of the regrets of his past.
so he stood silently.

11.10.2003

old man, take a look at your life, i'm a lot like you

today is sorrowful day.
today is a day that will remembered until the moon waxes and wanes no more.
today is the day that the volare died.

november 10, 2003

a blue plymouth volare was lain down nevermore to feel the asphalt at her tires.

11.08.2003

editor's note: don't read if you haven't seen matrix revolutions yet and don't want to read any spoilers

dear wachowski brothers,

first i have to say thank you for a few things:
thanks for restoring some of keanu's acting credibility.
thanks for casting miss moss and miss belluci in sexy sexy roles.
thanks for stirring my imagination for the last four years.
thanks for creating a fantastic video game (while not great on playability, it was superb on storyline and mythology of the matrix).
thanks for creating the animatrix, which filled in so much backstory and heightened the myth of the matrix.
thanks for using stunning visual effects and fantastic cinematography that kept me riveted the whole way through.
thanks for making mr weaving one of the greatest villians of all time--i'll never get tired of saying, "hello, mr anderson."
and lastly thanks for copping out and making a horrendous ending to what could have been one of the greatest trilogies of all time.

did you attend the george lucas how to fuck up a wonderful franchise school of filmmaking?

fine, neo dies as an allegory to christ. but, jesus, man, could have have found anything more contrite than settling for peace between the humans and machines?
according to your movies, this war has been waging for hundreds of years, and everytime, a one appeared, there was massive struggles and battles for who would win. the machines always triumphed, and humanity survived.
and now, it all just ends because neo convinced the machines to do it that way?
come on.
way to add way more to the story of the oracle, but then do nothing with it!
way to add sati, the last exile, and then do nothing with it!
way to make smith's role garguantuan, and then never explain why it was happening that way in this iteration of the matrix!
if smith was neo's opposite--his "negative"--to balance out the equation, wouldn't the matrix be fine, then? two values of opposite sign add to zero! 12 year olds know this, dude.
what happens with niobe and morpheus? love? hate? morpheus was fighting his whole life for the war, and now it ends and we don't know what he does next?
the architect--who dropped such a hugh mythology bomb on us in reloaded--gets just a few lines in this one?
the frenchmen and his hot wife appear for a few moments and then are forgotten for the rest of it?
i could go on with many more complaints about the weakness of your final third plot, but i won't.
i'm sure you'll hear from thousands of other fans that you managed to anger.

where was the real ending? the one where either the humans really triumph and vanquish the matrix, or the one where the machines crush us and our puny hopes? why did you cop out and take the middle road? roadkill happens in the middle of the road. either of those endings would have left us stunned, speechless, mind-fucked beyond belief. allowing us to talk about the matrix for years to come in a glowing tone.

just know, wachowskis, you had the potential to make a sci-fi trilogy that would have made starwars look like a fucking teletubbies trilogy, but you copped out.

sincerely,
reger

ps. i won't buy any of the trilogy on dvd now.

11.07.2003

what is going on?

well, boys, i haven't a thing to say to you. played a great game ... all of you. great game. i guess we can't expect to win 'em all.

i'm going to tell you something i've kept to myself for years. none of you ever knew george gipp. it was long before your time. but you know what a tradition he is at notre dame. and the last thing he said to me -- "rock," he said, "some time when the team is up against it -- and the breaks are beating the boys -- tell them to go out there with all they've got and to win just one for the gipper. I don't know where i'll be then, rock," he said, "but i'll know about it -- and I'll be happy."

all right.

11.06.2003

the garbage truck ran over our road cone

top 5 trek movies:
1. II wrath of kahn
2. VIII first contact
3. VI undiscovered country
4. X nemesis
5. IV voyage home

let's say you're sitting in math class. the teacher is writing equations on the board, going through and solving them. let's say that he writes down a=95. he then proceeds to use 95 wherever he sees in an a. let's say that the a appears--oh, i don't know--10 times.
but one time, he accidently writes down a 92 in one spot. he doesn't do the problem wrong or anything, he even refers to that 92 as a 95. it's just written wrong. do you point out this mistake? or do you just realize it should be a 95 and correct it in your notes?
if you're one of those people that knows it's a 95 and keeps their mouths shut, i like you.
if you're one of those people that has to correct the teacher and waste a full 5 minutes of my time waiting for the prof to figure out which 95 he has written wrong, i hate you.

worst 5 trek movies:
6. VII generations
7. IX insurrection
8. I orginial motion picture
9. III the search for spock
10. V the final frontier

11.04.2003

the battle of new orleans

breakfast is the most important meal of the day. after years of skipping it, falling asleep in class, being groggy most of the day and being hungry by 10am, i've realized this.

nothing like a tasty snack in the morn' to kickstart your metabolism.

so this morning i head to the kitchen to get some ciniamomon toast crunch, and i find only half a bowl left. ye gods! i am despondent. what's this? a full box of frosted flakes. but i wanted cinimin toast crunch.

half a bowl of cinomonin toast crunch and half a bowl of frosted flakes.
cover liberaly with cold milk.

reger 1, whoever thwarted my attempt to have a full bowl of cinnamon toast crunch 0.

11.03.2003

it's goin' to be un-or-thh-ah-docks

*sigh*
he looked out the small bathroom window. he didn't like twilight. at least not tonight, anyway. he turned back to the mirror to inspect the bruises on his face for the umpteenth today. they looked about the same color as the sky outside. and felt like hammered shit.
*sigh*
that's probably why he wanted the sky to finish turning black. if he were outside in the dark, he wouldn't need to see how he looked. he sighed again--adriane said he sighed a little too often lately for them not to sound forced. fuck her, she could pay the bill tonight.
he wrapped some paper towels around his hand, and cocked his arm. he cringed at the loud noise that never came. maybe this would be easy. he stuck his head out and looked up and down the alley. skipping out on adriane, who was out in a corner booth eating cheesecake with strawberries, would be easy. but he doubted the rest would be so.
*sigh*
with a quick leg up and out, he was walking east. east--out of town. the sun would greet him in the morning, and he would welcome it. for the first time in a long time, he felt clear and awake. probably because he was walking to his certain doom.
*sigh*
it's surprising how a lack of options brings about a stark clarity.

11.02.2003

tread softly because you tread on my dreams

there's this guy that used to work at trader joe's (i use "used to" because i assume after this weekend, he'll be fired). his name was keith. he was about 30. he seemed like an ok guy. played college b-ball, got into some trouble after school, and was working to get back on track. he had just moved to the area with his on/off girlfriend of 10 years. her name is stephanie and she got a job at trader joe's, too. kind of a ghetto mira sorvino of my cousin vinny. i liked working with her. she's a genuinuly nice person.

keith had a habit of skipping work once in a while. by once in a while, i mean once a week was norm. he didn't show up on friday night, and we just assumed he was pulling his stunts again. but then he was a no-show on saturday night as well. and that's when we found out that he stole stephanie's car and left friday and just disappeared without notice.

they had just sign a year lease on an apartment. her kid was living with them.

then i found out that he was in drug money trouble. stephanie had given keith her jewelry to pawn so he could pay off his debts. he didn't. he lost the jewlery. he kept up racking up the blow and the bills.

i guess the juice was too much for him and he bailed.

i used to like him. now, i just feel pity.

it's her--stephanie--that i'm more worried about. she moved her for him. she gave him money. she put up with this major shit. all for him, and his repayment is to steal her car and go awol.

i feel compassion and sympathy for her.

but if she takes him back if he ever does come back, it'll just be pity for her as well.

11.01.2003

i love how girls think all that's needed for a good halloween costume is knee/thigh-high stockings

learning about psychology can be a dangerous thing.
but also quite useful.

i used to think that people were just assholes, lazy, stupid, bad or even plain crazy, and there was no needed explanation for it. they just were.

now i understand that there is a reason behind everything. every "flaw" that a person has is from the not resolving an issue properly. (yes, this sounds like erickson's psychological model, but i don't think it delineates out into stages and that most of the development comes about after puberty hits).

take me for example. i've yet to resolve my fear of failure. there are a few skill sets that i have that i excel at. so good in fact, that it covered up my inabilities in other areas. i've able to avoid those situations where i could have failed and was praised for what i could do well. this compounded into the fact that i find it very hard to try to do anything outside of my skill sets. if i don't do well at something, i give it up immeadiately.

this has happened with women, school, sports and my ballet dreams.

so when i see how people behave--or mis-behave--towards others, i start looking for the cause, the motivation, that is making the person act that way. by doing this, i don't get angry as often as used to (i still explode at episodes of pure stupidity, but that's the human race--we're all doomed). instead, i feel more compassion and sympathy towards the person. trying to understand why they act the way they do and what i can do to help them resolve their problems--if i can at all.

i don't think i'm claiming i'm more mature than anyone else (ask my girlfriend for her opinion. whoa, boy. i love you, dear). i just think i'm starting to become more reflective about people and relationships. if this is just me being more educated, that's cool. if it's from the maturation process, i wish i would have started sooner.

10.31.2003

and so fell lord perth

i return.

when i started this blog, i thought, "hey, i can be funny and witty and people will like me. i can be cool, too!"

not that that happened, but i did get some funny responses and some good lines in.

but i fogot to notice that i was using the blog as a method of change. i could test ideas, clear out my mind, even solicit opinion through my digitial kingdom.

then i figured i got to a point where that was not what i needed. and i abandoned you.

but i realize i need you back. i need to write. i don't know why, but i need to write. even if it is nothing but ramblings and incohorent thoughts, i need to create prose. maybe someday, i could eek out a survival based on it, but for now it will just be a tool to survive.

and survive i must.

ba-da-da ba-da-da ba-da-da

right now, i'm trying to balance school, work, the woman and friends all at once. and i'll admit, the friends take backseat most of the time. is it because i know they'll be understanding about it? or is it because i'm an insensitive jerk who doesn't really care. little columbine a, little columbine b.

i'm making friends in my classes at worcester state. or the other students are talking to me and not shying away from my horribly disfigured face (the side burns are getting massive). i'm doing well in classes, i'm trying to keep up with the homeworks, i think i'm doing pretty good. anything over 3.0 for the semester and i'll be happy.

for my education classes, i have to observe some high school classes to get an understanding of what really goes on there. kids today are just extreme punks.
more on this later, cuz i have pages (pages!) of material for this one.

dark tower V comes out next tuesday. i'm giddy with anticipation.

ba-da-da ba-da-da ba-da-da

not much for right now, but reger is back.

i'm going to read everybody's blogs again, open that piece of my little world again.

i'm going to write random stuff about me, the world and our existence.

i'm going to bitch about people, sports teams and television commericials.

i'm going to try to connect everything together and discover the meaning of life is freshbaked bread with butter melting on it warming my tummy.

i'm going to do it all for me.

8.27.2003

how did i fail women's studies? i love bitches!

passion.

i lack passion.

it just maybe the fact i've been watching a lot of fantasy movies and reading some religious articles online, but i'm feeling that i don't have enough passion in my mindset. and i mean passion towards a cause, a destiny, a purpose.

passion towards some goal, some cause, some purpose where it consumes my very soul and just the thought of working on it sets my eyes on fire and heart burning.

i'm not talking about passion towards a sports team, a band, or a tv show. that's obsession.
i mean passion.
passion where the only thing that matters is serving that higher purpose. a passion that drives your being. your reason for being alive is to see your cause, your purpose, to fruition. no matter the stakes. no matter the cost. passion where you would lay down your life for the continuation of your purpose, for the triumph of your cause. passion where life and death and meaningless. passion where the flame that burns your soul needs more fuel than you could possibly feed it during your mortal days.

most of my life (actually, pretty much all of it), i've never actually tried for anything. never focused on anything long enough to do great with it. when the opportunity came along to make meaningful change, i backed off. i either quit, became so lazy i was forced out, or found someone else to take the job. i never pushed. i never made my mark. or if i did, it was because people were glad i had gone.

i never followed the passion that was yearning under the surface. waiting, patiently, for me to break through and let the floods cover my soul and wash me up to greater heights and push the cause to the next level.

i could list a handful or so organizations or causes where if i had just taken the next step, i could have been great at it. i could have marveled at what i had accomplished because i had pushed myself--and the cause--as far as i could humanly take it.

i don't know how many people have existential crises at 22, but i'm having one now.

i've never felt religion. and i mean deep spiritual religion. soul-filling communion with God. i don't know if that's just the way it goes, or something i clicked off in my head that keeps me from seeing God. i know God's out there, or in me, i just don't know how to find the Almighty.

i scream and shout about politics and society, and i take an active part in my civic duty, but i've found no political cause or worth that i could consume myself with. society may go to hell in a handbasket, and all i'll do is say "told ya so."

the closest i feel i come to passion is with my fraternity, TKE. it has angered me and saddened me many times over the past 4 years, and yet i keep coming back to give more because i believe it's a worthy cause and a righteous message of building better men. but even then i fucked it up royally. my sophomore year at wpi, i could have pushed harder, done good, forced issues and championed causes, but instead i was lazy and i've been paying the price of not being a true leader in the house ever since. i sit back and am regulated to the second tier of leadership because i refused to allow the passion to take hold and drive me to excellence--to drive others to excellence. and now i'm an old man (in fraternity life span) and i don't know what i have to show for it.

i float through life scraping by. never really doing anything. my life is spent meandering day to day hour to hour. i know i have the potential to do great. i know i have the abilities to do something worthwhile. something worthy of song and rememberance after my days on this ground have long since past. but will i do anything about? or just accept contentment and plod along?

my girlfriend has done a lot for me in the past year. she helped convince me to go back to school and take more charge of my life. she believes in me. more than i think she should, but that's love, honey. and she has all of mine.

i sit in the dark typing away. letting my thoughts meander and float and flail about. passion--a purpose--is the resting point for my train of thought. i refuel it with ideas of saving humanity, saving myself, saving the universe. delusions of grandeur or fate telling me to get my ass in gear?

i want to feel the burn, i know that. i want to be known for something great. i want ghandi, mother tersea, martin luther king jr, abraham lincoln type of fame. i want to make a change that will be felt for generations. a change where people say, "it's a damn good thing he came along when he did, or we'd be in an even bigger pile of shit than we are now." i want to feel the passion. i want i want i want. but where do i begin? how do i find the spark to ignite my soul and drive my destiny to its fullest?

i honestly don't know, and that scares the bejesus out of me.

reality check: i start school at worcester state tomorrow. round 2 of trying to get a college degree. i think that's what is bringing most of this angst on. people have told me that they believe in me and that i'm intelligent enough to do fine at college, if only i would have confidence in myself. everything is finalized for school. books bought. notebooks labeled. stapler has staples. all i need are some snak-paks and i'll be all set.

but i'm still worried. i don't know what will happen this time around. i do know that i can't afford to fuck this up like i did wpi. i do know that i need to succeed at woo state or...or...i don't know.

but it won't be good.

8.14.2003

momma don't take my kodachrome away

i'm losing touch with why i blog.

is it for the people that leave comments?
is it for the people that google random shit and click here?
is it for the regular readers that i've so unexplicably built up?
is it for my mom?

is it for me?

i haven't had anything to write, so i haven't.
i won't be for a few more days for sure, at least. mainly cuz i'm going to vermont for the weekend then to montreal to see the expos/giants on monday.

but the real issue is why i feel as though i've lost my muse.
i try to be funny sometimes, and i don't think it comes off.
i try to be insightful most of the time, but i don't think people understand me.
i try to a good writer, yet i feel as though i'm two steps behind the game.

this weekend will be good for recharging my spirit (and bad for my liver), so we'll see how the creativity flows when i get back.

8.08.2003

i have a pound of muscovado brown

the guy that drops off the delivery at trader joe's is tommy.

i usually just say, "what's up?" and not pay attention to his answer. i didn't really like him.
tommy always comes in and complains about the weird music we play (which, in his defense, we play wierd shit). he complains about the food we usually have out to snack on. "what is this fruity natural crap?" is his usual saying. especially about anything that says "yogurt" on the label (but he really likes the cookies. he's got a soft spot for the pecan sandies). he always goes rooting through the registers for new state quarters. for the past couple months, the guy has kind of been on my nerves. i pretty much ignore him when he comes in at 4am. i just thought he was a bitter old man.

but the other day, i went into the back room to toss out some cardboard, and i found him sitting on a box waiting for the morning guy to finish checking in the pallets. his expression is what made me pause.

he just looked old.
a tired, worn out man waiting for when he could go home--go home for good--and spend time with whatever family he has (if he even has any). he was just sitting there. tired. worn out.
what was keeping me from being like him in 40 years? an old man with a limp driving trucks during the middle of the night? what were his hopes and dreams when he was my age? is this what he had wanted when he started off in the world? and, if not, where did he go wrong? how could i avoid that same fate?

i was taken aback by how strongly i empathized with tommy that night. he just wasn't that kooky old man that i needed to avoid for an hour every morning. he was a real person that deserved as much compassion as my best friends did.

now i greet him with an ethusiastic "good morning, tommy! how's it today?"
and i make sure to care about his answer.

8.05.2003

even though my car is shitty, i can't even dream of owning another.

i no longer want to be called a hippie.
the connotation just doesn't fit my world view anymore.

i'm on the left on most things.
drug laws
most environmental issues
universal healthcare
universal education
most foreign policy

but i'm on the right for some things.
i support the death penalty
bring on the genetically engineered foods
reduction of welfare benefits.
imf and world bank are good things
so is the globalisation of the world economy
nuclear power is efficient and clean if we handle it properly
we need to have a strong military (but that doesn't mean we have to use it pre-emptively. oops, this is supposed to be my right list)

i find i have a conglomeration of political viewpoints, and that most political parties out there do not satisfy most of my needs.
i am anti rumsfeld, wolfowitz, and cheney
i'm pro clinton (bill) and i think president dean has a nice ring to it.

i'm thinking that i should just start my own political party. the choice party. cuz it's the right choice at the right time.

i make my first run for the presidency in 2016.

in liberal news, i give the thumbs up to the new gay bishop of the episcopal chuch.

in conservative news, the same legal challenges used in bush v. gore (which settled the infamous florida scandel and gave bush the presidency) are being used by gray davis in his bid to stop the gop-lead recall effort in california.

8.04.2003

tramps like us, baby, we born to ride

spent yesterday helping my boss move from dover, ma to derry, nh.
longest day of my life.
his best friend marc came to help but did nothing.
when he would move a box, he would take a 5 minute break afterward.
when you came in and put down something big and/or heavy, he would give a big *sigh* like he was wicked tired and needed the break.
i even got him taking a nap on one of the chairs we moved into the new apartment while me and reagan (another coworker) were moving box after box.
this may be hypocritical, but i hate lazy people.
i'm lazy, but when there is shit that has to get done, i'll make sure it gets the fuck done.
instead of making sure "the cats are doing alright."

good news about the move, i got to drive the massive 24 foot moving truck. it was fun. i've never driven anything that big. it was a smooth ride. it had better suspension than the volare (at least when the truck was full, that is). but it was wierd getting back in the volare and riding one foot off the ground after spending the weekend driving 4 feet off the ground.

also, have you seen the espn fantasy football commericials yet? the one where the kid gets the bosses porshe and the day off? (i couldn't find it online, but check out the morning runs of sportscenter and you'll see it) well, i thought the guy looked familiar and my mom let me know today that it was this kid i knew in high school--karl.
i just think that's cool.

8.01.2003

you got me on my knees

i've finally realized that it is good that i'm a couple pounds (read: 30-40 lbs) over my ideal weight.

1. the gut acts as a pillow for the girlfriend. if we were cuddling on the couch and i didn't have the gut, she would have to rest her head on a rock hard six pack. that just isn't comfy.

2. the love handles act as natural ledges so when i'm carrying boxes there isn't as much stress on my arms.

3. i'm always warm.

4. only two kinds of guys were hawaiian shirts: gay guys and big, fat party animals.

5. i never get tired of hearing the "when's the baby due?" joke.

6. if i was stuck on a deserted island with a skinny person, they would die first from starvation and then i could eat what was left of them.

7.31.2003

i won't toe your line today, i can't see it anyway

onto my latest cahrazy dream.

i'm at a party with some people. half the people are naked. it said on your invitation whether or not you were supposed to come naked. i was wearing clothes. everyone is chilling out talking to people, eating food, drinking wine. i sit in a corner wondering why i've been invited and who actually thinks up a half-your-guests-are-naked-the-other-half-aren't party and then gets people to show up.
finally, the lady that i think is the hostess (she's clothed) comes up to me and asks me if i want to go to the store to get some milk for the party before it closes. i jump at the opportunity. i'll even take my car i explain to her. she hands me a fiver and gives me directions to the honey farms. i get in my car and drive away. trying to follow her instructions means i have to go down a one way the wrong way.
so i do.
i pull up to the convenience store just in time to see the guy shut off the lights and lock the door. i'm pissed.
i grab a mountain bike that was in my trunk and start biking towards the supermarket across the street (don't ask why i didn't take my car, i don't know). i go into the grocery store, but now it's an l.l. bean store. i wander around wondering if they have milk somewhere on display, but they don't.
so i hop back on my bike and start biking around the town stopping at various stores, but none of them are open. i'm getting worried, cuz it's starting to get late. finally, i find this little convenience store that is open in the middle a cemetary. they have milk. for $4.99 a gallon. i'm not impressed by them trying to rip me off, but i pay the money.
then i realize that i have no idea where i am. i ask for directions back to the party. i'm told that i'm in the next town over and i have over 20 miles to bike back. this doesn't faze me. i'm worried about hte milk getting warm before i get back and whether or not the hostess will be pissed the milk cost $4.99.
i step outside, notice that the sun is starting to rise and jump on my bike and start heading in the direction i was told to go--east.
i pull up to rest at a stoplight and look over to see two chinese women in my car.
they were stealing it.
i jump on the hood my car and start yelling at them. finally they get out of my car and i head back towards the party.

then i wake up.

i never found out if the hostess was pissed about the expensive milk showing up the next morning.
i'm quite curious.

7.29.2003

just get messed up on your best stuff

i was wondering why it was taking so long to get a finicial aid package from worcester state, and i found out why today.
the federal goverment.
i processed my fafsa on 5/11 and i got an email today saying it was processed on 7/29.
i filled it out online and submitted it that day. it took them 2 1/2 months to process it.
somehow, that doesn't seem very quick to me.

man, i can't wait til i get to run the federal government starting on jan 20, 2017.

the volare passed 70,000 miles on sunday morning.
i was even stopped at a stoplight when it was reading 7 and zeros.
i desperately wanted a digital camera. hell, any camera.
i almost asked the guy stopped next to me if he had one on him.
i should have. you only hit 70 thou once on a 1979 blue plymouth volare with a 220 cubic inch single barrel carb slant six with a 3 speed automatic transmission that has cruise control--and a bench seat in the front.

i'm glad that the terror market the pentagon was thinking up was shut down. but the very fact that this--a market for investors to basically bet on when and where the next terrorist attack or assination would be--got out of a meeting and actually put forward with a website and program and potential investors makes me sad that i live in america.
senator carl levison of michigan thought 'that it was a hoax."
sen. ron wydon of oregon had this--which basically sums up my opinion on it--to say, "the idea of a federal betting parlor on atrocities and terrorism is ridiculous and it's grotesque."
i'm glad the plug was pulled before it got to the point--and this speaking pessimistically probably a bit cynical--that people were trying to make sure their "investments" actually happened.
i agree with what senator warner of virginia had to say about it:
"here's been no effort whatsoever to make it secret. the program is modeled after a successful program, utilized by one of the nation's foremost think tanks, which while not directed toward terrorism, is directed toward analysis of other contingencies in the future, and in the community's been perceived as a fairly successful program."
but if they want to go through with it, they should use it set up with dummy money and let fark run it.
a futures market could have it's place in the fight against terrorism, but i think someone got overzealous and tried to rush it out without taking an assessment of how it was actually going to be run--and perceived--by the public.
measure twice. cut once.

i can't wait til i run the federal government starting jan 20, 2017.

7.27.2003

what is the difference between chow mein and lo mein?

i don't like going to work.

the actual physical process of leaving my place and going to work is hell.

being out of work or at work is fine. i'm cool with that. it's just the transition phase.
it's a metaphor for life.

my boss told me the story about how he's going to trade in his volkswagen in 2 years cuz the guy told that sold it to him told him that when 3 out of the 4 years are up on the lease to come in and they'll "talk numbers." i heard it three times last night. i can't even remember how many times he told me that story this week.
he tells the same stories over and over.
and he sucks at telling a story.
oh, and never mind the story about how he got honorably discharged from the navy for having (and this is a quote) "homosexual encounters while on shore leave." that one nevers gets old.
plus, we have to listen to dave matthews at least 10458% percent of the time that we are there. i like dave, but i'm getting sick of it.

i hate going to work.

the only things that keep me sane are the paycheck (which ain't much) and jake. jake is my coworker that lived the 60s and 70s. saw the zeppelin concert where they played stairway for the first time. moved to the bahamas at 20 with $300 cuz he was bored with philly. has seen every movie known to man. and can dish some funny oneliners. if he wasn't there and i just had to work with my boss, i would be in jail for homocide.
maybe.
i don't know if they would convict me or not.
we listened to the same dave matthews bootleg 4 days in a row.

i hate going to work.

i think we should only work 2 days a week and have a 5 day weekend. this guy i met last night, david from germany, thinks the same. he's here from cologne to do research for the chem eng department here at wpi. he's a cool guy. he gets the thumbs up. i think he has the same social philosophy that i do, so that's refreshing that the revolution will take place in europe as well.
but, seriously. we should only have a 2 day work week. that would be super sweet.

oh well, it's my weekend now. so enough bitching.

i'll just fall asleep to led zeppelin II.

7.25.2003

he'll give you a weird look

i'm out in the woods. i don't really know why i'm there. it's either sunset or sunrise. i don't know which direction is which. i'm standing on the shores of a lake looking out at the still water.
this guy motors over in an inflatable boat with a big motor on the back of it.
"you need to come with us"
"ok"
i hop in the boat and start driving it. i'm driving across the lake. i don't know why i have to cross the lake. i just know that i need to get to the other end of it.
we get to a waterfall. i just jump right over it and splash down into the rapids. running the boat at top speed, i wail over the rapids pushing the boat to its limits. i have to get to the other side of this lake. i must.
we finally get to this clear pool of water, and i let the boat float up to the edge. i'm at the base of a mountain. there are stone steps leading down into the mountain. i follow them.
at the bottom, these people--5 guys and 5 women--show up in business suits and place a hat on my head and a staff in my hand. the bring me to this large stone table in the middle of this medieval chamber and we all sit around it.
"we'd like to be the first to congratulate you on being the new pope," says the one guy that looks like val kilmer.
"the new pope?"
"yes, you've been selected from all the people in the world to be the next pope," says the guy that looks like howard stern.
"but i'm not even catholic!"
"haha. the pope hasn't been catholic for over 500 years," says the lady that is wearing sunglasses.
"alright, cool. what do i have to do?"
they spend the next few hours explaining to me about what i need to do as the pope, what powers i get over the world's nations, and how many assassinations i get to order a year. it's money being the pope.
then all my friends start showing up in the chamber. looking for food and the entertainment center.
"what are you guys doing here?"
"oh, we heard you're the pope, so we're going to crash here for awhile, if you don't mind," says brendan.
"i guess that's cool. just keep it down, we're having a meeting here. by the way, how did you get here?"
"we took the elevator."
"i took a 2 hour boat ride over waterfalls and killer rapids to get here, and you took an elevator!"
one of the other ladies--the one that was bald like the chick in the first star trek movie--speaks up, "we had to send you that way to see if you could be the pope."

then i woke up, realized--sadly--that i wasn't the pope, and rolled back over for more sleep.
join us next time for another exciting chapter of the reger and his whacked out dreams.

7.24.2003

the advancement of the reversal has hit some snags

time for me to bitch about the system:

in yesterday's boston globe, along side the main article of hussien's kids killed (good for everybody), was an article about how one of national security advisor rice's assistants is the one that screwed up the state of the union "mistake."

but i thought tenet of the cia was to blame? he said he shouldn't have let the statement in the address, but he also told some members of congress during a hearing that he had never read the speech. so it's this guy hadley's fault.

so who is really to blame for this? i was against the administration's reasons for the invasion of iraq long time ago. i won't even buy their bullshit about how it's about the people of iraq and liberating oppressed people. that's a fine and dandy reason, but then why are we dilly-dallying over 2400 troops for liberia? who is actually in some serious need of american military muscle. oh, that's right. we still have 140,000 troops in iraq (i hope to God that the fatalities of our troops will stop in iraq) and no real plan for getting that country set up as exxonmobil middle east.

there is a coverup about the real reason we went to war. rumsfeld should just come out and say, "yeah, i bullied powell and bush into doing this. bush was easy. it just took a cookie. but i had to beat the colonel a bit to bring him to our side. it's my call, and i'm glad we did it. also, today president bush signed an executive order granting me the title dark overlord of the american empire."

and then there has only been one democratic candidate that has been railing against this war loudly since it started: howard dean of vermont. he'll be getting my vote in the primary just so i can watch him make bush squeam during the debates. besides kerry of massachusetts, the rest of the imbeciles running for the donkey ticket make me actually think about keeping bush in office another 4 years.

steve told me about this guy at work that said something to effect: intellectuals aren't popular people. just look at our president's approval ratings.

but, hey, it doesn't matter. we got our one member of the "axis of evil"--that's good enough. nevermind that we haven't found any wmds or any facilities for making them or even saddam himself. and nevermind that n. korea has been processing spent rods from nuclear power plants that will be used to make the bomb. nevermind that the koreans getting the bomb will lead to an asian arms race where japan and even australia will be clamoring for some nuclear deterrents. we'll get our 35 cent gallons of gas, and the average american moron will be happy.

i don't have anything against the conservative ideology per se. i am against the cronyism and corruption that is rampant in both major parties. i am against the abuse of the american system of government for rummy and co to get their world empire. i am against the democrats for being giant pansies and not even trying to do anything about this when they had the opportunity.

someone needs to take the power back.

in political good news, the house has decided to overturn the fcc's decision to increase television station ownership from 35% to 45%. the senate is also looking to do the same.
good work boys. too bad you can only agree on something that won't really help the millions of uninsured children in america. or the veterns being denied medical assistance. or the thousands of illegal immigrants that are absorbing our resources. or the bigots that beat homosexuals, non-whites and/or women on a daily basis.
thanks for keeping clear channel from buying some tv stations. my life is so much better now.

it also looks like the gop lead effort to oust california gov. davis by recall is going to go through. over a million signatures were verified, paving the way for a special election within the next 90 days. the only good thing about this is that we may get our second predator star into a governor's mansion. that's right soon to join the ranks of jesse ventura, will--fingers crossed--be arnold schwarzenegger. before one could only dream of a world where the terminator kindergarten cop conan the barbarian/destroyer would be an elected official. in all honesty, i think it would be good to have governor arnold.

but mostly i'm just bitter at the entire establishment right now.

do not anger the hippie. he has much rage inside.

only 13 more years til i begin my presidential campaign.