throwin' 'bos

you make concessions for people because they are your friends and supposedly they share a bond with you that most people don't. but then you refuse to extend that to them on certain situations. or you make a double standard when you deal with them in certain situations. this blows my mind. and upsets me greatly. upsets me to the point of wanting to step away from it all. also relieved because most of the people that i feel are causing the problem will soon no longer have positions of authority. once in awhile, the passion returns. but then, someone makes me feel that my opinion is worthless. the only consolation is that i don't think i'm the only one.

disclaimer: the following has nothing to do with my own relationship, i am very happy with carla. this is just observations i've made of other people. you should not mix with ex-significant others. maybe the people i know are just really immature and i suck with having a relationship with my exes, but i've never seen any good coming out of exes getting back together. the relationship ended for some reason--either you thought it was over or the other person did or it was mutual. relationships need to evolve just like individuals do. and my experience is that one of the partners have evolved faster than the other person or the relationship as a whole. and there is nothing wrong with that. that is just the way the human dynamic works. but it's the aftermath that is hard to deal with. trying to get back together or "trying it again" has never worked in my experience or watching others experiences. i used to be surprised when people broke up and was like "why would you get rid of them? but now i realize that relationships have to grow and if they aren't given nutrients by both partners, the growth will be stunted or it won't grow at all. it bothers me when people think that once it's dead, they can grow it back. you need a new plant. jeez, this growth metaphor just went to shit. anyhoo, the point of this rant was i think it's rare for exes to get back together and have a good relationship again. the ability to be friends (or at least on cordial terms) i think is something that can happen. it just requires time and a willingness on both parties to be friends. it's hard to get both to think in those terms and not the old feelings get in the way of trying to make a lasting friendship. now that i've written this, it doesn't really make that much sense. i've been distracted by driven on the tv instead of trying to make sure this was logical and coherent. but i've spent too long trying to write it so i'm just going to post it anyway. enjoy.

good news, i whooped ass in the first day of the tke fantasy league. i don't expect this to last long, but i do expect to be top 3 in our league.

not much war news from me lately, just check these out:
al jazeera--it's just as fair as cnn
english version of al jazeera

"i'm out there, jerry! and i'm lovin' it!"--cosmo kramer