eyes the color of canadian whiskey

there is a lenscrafters right across from where i work. it has blazing red neon lights running the edges of its storefront.
to me, this seems a bit odd.
an eyecare place is causing my eyes to hurt everytime i look at the place.
one would guess that the guy in charge there is either blind or not a very good eyedoctor. either case, i'll stick to my lenscrafters in the mall.

with the woman out of town, i've discontinued the grooming act of shaving.
the woman doesn't approve of a bread, but i approve of a beard.
so i don't grow one. but she's gone for another week, so "hello, sasquatch!"

i have a theory that subway is trying to create a religion.
look at their commercials. in 500 years, archeaologists are going to think that jared was some type of messiah figure.
then they came out with john henry the fireman guy--he's to jared what paul was to jesus.
then came the guy that goes around and saves people from "boring" food to the salvation that is the subway.
and now, there are more subways than mcdonald's in america.
subway is becoming the all-american icon of fast food. if people start associating america with subway instead of mcdonald's, there is no telling what kind of power base they will be able to create in the world. a subway shop on every street corner of every city in the world.
and i don't think they are going to let it stop at that.
no way, jose.
the second apostle of jared has already been found.
may the sandwich god bless you, and the angels of soutwest teriyaki sauce protect you.