metaphors and such

while watching sportscenter this morning, i was informed that the owner of the nba expansion team in charolette said that too old to play michael jordan could come and be the executive president or some position of that nature.
his reasoning: "it's like having the greatest chef in the world and not letting him into the kitchen."
i have a problem with that sports team simile.
the players are not the chefs. the coaches are the chefs. the sous chefs are the asst coaches. the owner of the restaurant and management is like the executives and general manager and owner.
the players are the food.
and michael jordan is past his expiration date.
so what the guy really should have said was, "it's like having the greatest cheese in the world that's gone moldy and not letting him into the kitchen."
which sounds ridiculous.
you don't let food cook.
for one, they don't have opposable thumbs.
and they would have to be pretty sadistic food to cut up and cook their own kind.
i don't want that kind of psychopath in the kitchen of any restaurant
so if you're going to make analogies between restaurants and sports teams, please make sure to make one that makes sense.

i still will not jinx them by saying anything about their future performance. but i can comment on past games. like last night's game 7 that was oh so saweet.

sexy ladies want par with us
in a car with us
them nah war with us
in a club them want flew with us
to get next to us
them cah vex with us
from the day we born jah ignite me flame
gal a call me name and it is me fame
it's all good girl turn me on
'til the early morn'
let's get it on
let's get it on 'til the early morn'
girl it's all just turn me on